I don't know if he is pushing my buttons because he's lazy or if I'm just super PMSing this time. Whatever is the cause, it needs to quit it, yesterday. I'm up, I'm down. I'm pissy, I'm fine. All in the matter of a minutes time or thereabouts. And THE BOYFRIEND, WHY does he do things because he wants to, when he wants to? It doesn't make sense. It's somewhat childish and narcissistic.
And the whole "big sister" thing he has with the woman he brought to the Christmas Party, I'm a little jealous about. I get it. I really do. But why can't he be like that with me? It's not that he's going to have a "thing" with her. Just that he doesn't really act like that with me. That he has to be around her and be all excited. I should feel happy that I get to see a side of him that he doesn't really show to too many people. That he doesn't hide his emotions from me the way he does to other people. So why am I not?
It's almost 8 months in and why am I feeling/thinking like this now? He hasn't changed one bit. He's always been this way. And it hasn't bothered me before. Which leads me to believe that I'm just being super Cancer-ish right now. Super crabby, super moody. All over imaginative faults and imaginative hurts perpetrated by THE BOYFRIEND. Which is completely irrational of me to behave this way. I need to stop.
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