For example, this weekend I of course spent it with him in his house and around St. Augustine. We didn't tear each other's clothes off as soon as I walked in the door. We lasted 15 minutes, but, hey, it's an improvement. ... Nah, I'm a-ok with both. That was just a quick hello fuck. Sometime later was the best non-high fuck of my life. It was simply amazing. I went until I couldn't go anymore, collapsing sweating and panting heavily onto his chest. I have to say I do love it when he cums. Right before he sticks his tongue out to his top lip, concentrating heavily. Then when he does actually cum, he says "shit!" and hangs his head down and then exhales heavily.
Saturday, I called out sick from work; you all have done it once or twice, I don't need chastising. I just really wanted to spend more time with him. Doing nothing. Actually it all worked out for the best. In the previous post, I said I went to the ER, having passed out from "mild starvation" according to the ER doctor. It's actually really funny now. And really it was funny when I came around at the hospital. Hey, even the nurses and EMTs were laughing with me. So around 7p, we went to get something to eat. Took a hit of weed before we left; I only had ONE hit. Visited our respective banks for cash (the pizza place only took cash). Out by my bank's atm, I said
"If I don't get something to eat soon, I'm going to pass out."He gave me this incredulous look, so I says to Mabel I says,
"What? I'm not complaining, I'm just saying."We ended up at a pizza joint near him. The line was out the door! But I really wanted something to eat, and the line was moving semi-quickly. I gave them my order (one slice of pepperoni pizza). I was talking with him, and then suddenly I get really weak and my vision starts to go black. I don't remember what happened next, honestly. WHAT he told me happened is that I said, "I am going to fall over." He tried to move me to the booth behind me so I can sit down. But, I just dropped, like a dead weight (i.e. passed unconscious). He apparently barely got a hold of me in time so that my head didn't smack on the hard floor. When I came to, I was sitting in a booth, all sweaty and hyperventilating. Some woman was holding my wrist, checking my pulse I guess and I could barely make out THE BOYFRIEND hovering near me, sounding extremely worried. I still couldn't see very well, couldn't hold open my eyes. I don't know if it was the store owner or manager, but the guy was kneeling in front of me, on the phone to 9-1-1 to get paramedics out to me. I really just wanted THE BOYFRIEND to hold my hand and stroke my hair until I could get something to eat. They had me sip (slowly) coke and orange juice (not at the same time, ew), put a wet rag behind my neck.
The paramedics came, and took me away, he held me hand as they wheeled me out the door. As they closed the doors to the ambulance, I heard one of the EMTs ask THE BOYFRIEND,
"Is that your sister?"And EVEN THOUGH I was barely conscious at the time, when I heard him say it, I kinda felt better. I don't need him to say it, we are both aware of what the other is and that is all that matters. I think at some point I am going to have to make clear how I feel about honesty in a relationship. Back to the trip, THE BOYFRIEND doesn't ride in the ambulance with me, he ran home to get the car. The EMTs couldn't get a line in me; they tried twice in each arm. It didn't hurt; I have so many holes in my arms now. On the ride there, one of the EMTs was giving me a lecture about drugs. I had to tell them about the one hit of weed. I will not lie to a medical professional.
"No, she's my girlfriend."
"If you were going to be doing any drugs, I would want it to be weed. I have never seen anyone OD on smoking weed. They stop being motivated, and fall asleep is all. So, yeah, if you were going to be doing any drugs, I think it's best that it's weed."In my head, and I couldn't really show it on my face, but I am entertained by this EMT lecturing me about drugs and weed. At the hospital, when they get me to my room, and all hooked up on monitors and shit, I am finally able to hold open my eyes. THE BOYFRIEND walks in after a nurse helped out of my shirt and bra, and into a hospital gown. He looked so worried, and I am so happy to see him there. For the rest of the hospital time, I am laughing and think that this entire situation is so hilarious. The nurses and EMTs are laughing and poking fun with me. I mean, really I am not in the least one of the worst cases they have seen that day. A hospital worker came to get me for a urine sample. As she is walking me down the hall to the bathroom, she is holding my gown closed in the back. I had jeans on! I don't care if they see my back. But I am laughing the entire time as I walk to the bathroom. I checked my text messages like an hour later. I see that I have gotten one from THE BOYFRIEND. He texted me as I was walking to the bathroom,
"You are so beautiful."Yes, he is that amazing. He sits next to me the entire time and holds my hand. We both haven't eaten a thing. I get discharged at 11:45pm. We are both starving. Really, for someone who has supposedly passed out from "mild starvation" they should get them something to eat, or at least hang an IV bag. GEESH! Another thing, the nurses couldn't get a line in me either. It took them two or three tries. One in my left wrist, one in my left hand, and one or two times in my right arm. I knew I was a bad stick, but wow, that's terrible. I was probably a tad dehydrated at the time too.
We get home, eat and then collapse from extreme tiredness. We wake up the next morning, he went to get his coke (boy cannot function without his coca cola), he got me coffee. :) I had a bagel and nutella left over from the morning before. Half an hour later we have sex. Eat some more. He will not do to have me pass out again. His sister came for a visit; we ate sandwiches and walked around town for a bit. It was weird meeting his sister. We have only been seeing each other for like two weeks, it's a tad awkward. I wouldn't have him meet my family until about 4 or 5 months of ... dating. But you know, it happened so that's that.
So later, after we had taken a nap, we try to have sex. I do not know what went wrong. His head was probably off on it's own. He just could not keep it up. I think it has something to do with me, that I'm not doing something right or along those lines. Smoke, chatter and tunes. I'm nestled in between his legs, against his chest. He asks me,
"So, how do you want to be introduced? As (insert my name here) my friend, or as my girlfriend?"His hands are roaming, my hands are roaming. He moves out from under me, and I start scratching away; he gets the look, and we start kissing. Leaving the outside and get back to his room, he starts tearing my clothes off and being really forceful in his kissing. This turns me on so much. He shoves me down to his bed, and goes down on me, biting my thighs and really brings me to a head with his fingers. We fuck; quick and hard. As always, IT WAS AMAZING. God, I really do love fucking him. Afterwards, as he is hovering over me on his forearms, he says,
"Whatever. I really don't care."
"Oh thank god! You aren't crazy. It's about around this time that the crazy signs start to show up."
I laugh very heartily.
"If some girl starts flirting with you, I may just have to beat some one down. Just saying."
"Finally! I am a man!"I laugh at this exclamation from him.
"There was a doubt?"I wonder all the time if I'm starting to fall in love with the guy. This is not what I wanted. Not when I invited him over for the first time. I just really wanted to get laid. Don't really know if that's what I want now, to be in love with someone. But he turned out to be this amazing, sweet, caring guy that just won't get out of my head. I'm constantly thinking about him. At first it was just about sex with him that I thought about. Now, it's loving thoughts, how I just want to be near him, and how he just brightens my day whenever I see him, or think about him. I know he really likes me; he said so himself right after the impotency incident Sunday. See, he really did just want to make sure I wasn't going to go all crazy and possessive on him. This relationship with him is what it is, and I'm not really going to force it into something that it's not.
"Well, I had a statement to make." sheepish grin from him.
"All you needed was to make sure I wasn't going to go crazy on you." big ol' laugh from me.
As I'm updating, he is currently asleep on my bed, snoring away, having been extremely exhausted from work. He is adorable, sleeping there, buried under my covers. I wish I knew what is going on inside my head; or my heart.
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